I like long walks, especially when they are taken ... -Fred Allen

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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Fred Allen , Comedian
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Fred Allen Quotes to Explore

All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it....
I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there....
A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized....
The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed....
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back....
Television is a medium because anything well done is rare....
I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement....
The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand....
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange....
The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion....

Funny Quotes to Explore

My gift is to be funny....
The audience changes every night. You're the same person. You have to speak your mind and do the stuff that you think is funny and makes you laugh....
There's something dangerous about what's funny. Jarring and disconcerting. There is a connection between funny and scary....
I'm not so funny. Gilda was funny. I'm funny on camera sometimes. In life, once in a while. Once in a while. But she was funny. She spent more time wo...
I can do comedy, so people want me to do that, but the other side of comedy is depression. Deep, deep depression is the flip side of comedy. Casting a...
It's so funny because my mom is Thai and my dad is this big American guy - and our food tastes were so similar growing up. He was meat and potatoes, I...
It's been very funny to try to act like an adult. Even getting dressed. Every day, I'm like, 'Should I wear a blazer and walk around with an umbrella?...
My mother is very funny. She is from a village; she has a typical village kind of humour. Often she says a lot of things she herself isn't aware is a ...
I've always loved 'Umbrella.' Funny enough, my ex-husband wrote that, and I'm not saying it was meant for me or anything - people will start twisting ...
Funny is the world I live in. You're funny, I'm interested. You're not funny, I'm not interested....